The books on this site is provided for your convenience. The views expressed in these publications may not necessarily represent the views of Miscarriage Support Auckland Inc, New Zealand.

Books on Miscarriage Pregnancy and Health

Coping with Miscarriage (NZ)

Kitch Cuthbert and Sandra van Eden
New Zealand Women’s Health Series Reed Methuen, Auckland, 1987.
Coping with Miscarriage has been written to help women and their partners cope with this distressing event. It explains the process and aftermath of miscarriage in physical and emotional terms; it suggests ways in which women can help themselves come to terms with their miscarriages and derive support from their families, friends and the community. An authoritative and sensitive book offering information, reassurance and support for women and their partners, and it gives health professionals an insight into their role in helping women during and after miscarriage.
3 copies

A Silent Sorrow: Pregnancy Loss: Guidance and Support For You and Your Family

Ingrid Kohn, Perry-lynn Moffit and Isabelle Wilkins
Routledge, New York and London, 2nd ed, 2000.
An excellent book on pregnancy loss and how to cope with it. Offers comfort, coping strategies and the latest information on causes, diagnosis and treatment. 

Baby Gone

True New Zealand stories of infertility, miscarriage, stillbirth and infant loss
Jenny Douché, Published by Hugs Press Limited 2011, distributed by Random House
Baby Gone contains 45 true stories that are written from the heart by those affected.
If you, or someone you know, is missing a part of their lives this book may give great comfort.

Beyond Childlessness

Rachel Black and Louise Scull
Published by Rodale International Ltd. June 2005
For every woman who wanted to have a child and didn’t.

Coming to Term

Jon Cohen
Published by Houghton Mifflin November 2005
A review of the known science behind miscarriage including actual studies and information about the mechanism of miscarriage, providing hope for couples trying to conceive after multiple losses. See review

Endometriosis: One Woman’s Story (NZ)

Megan Harvey
Shoal Bay Press, Christchurch, 1997.
Relates Megan’s long struggle from the confusion of years of unexplained blinding pain to the relief of diagnosis, the grief of infertility and eventual ‘cure’ – in her case, a complete hysterectomy at the age of 22. Case studies, treatment advice and a strong underlying theme of emotional support make this book an essential and affirming guide for endometriosis sufferers, their friends and families. The problems Megan endured, emotional as well as physical, make harrowing reading – but her journey back to a ‘normal’, happy life show that it is possible to be an endometriosis survivor.

Healing Mind, Healthy Woman

Alice Domar Ph.D. and Henry Dreher
USA 1996 Sub-titled “Using the Mind-Body connection to manage stress and take control of your life”, this is a practical book is full of different relaxing techniques. The authors then talk about specific “women’s problems” including miscarriage and infertility and suggests how to use relaxation techniques to help. It’s all very Californian, but would be helpful in that scary subsequent pregnancy.

Help, Comfort and Hope – After losing your baby and pregnancy in the first year

Hannah Lothrop
Published by Da Capo – LifeLong

Hidden Loss: Miscarriage and Ectopic Pregnancy, a Women’s Press Handbook Series

UK,1989, fully revised 1996. This book has really excellent information on causes of miscarriage and ectopic pregnancy as well as options in subsequent pregnancies. Useful glossary of terms too. It has a strong feminist perspective and includes personal stories about elective abortion as well as miscarriage and ectopic pregnancy. The language is sometimes a bit academic, but otherwise it’s a great book.

Infertility (NZ)

Sue Sanders
Penguin, Auckland, 1998.
The first hand experience of a patient undergoing the complicated procedures of infertility treatment.

Is Your Body Baby-Friendly?

Unexplained Infertility, Miscarriage and IVF Failure – Explained.
by Alan E. Beer M.D.
ISBN 0978507800
(Published October 28th 2006)

What to do when your immune system says “no” to pregnancy. This new book contains information on the latest medical tests and treatments to help women conceive and carry to term. Working in long distance collaboration with IVF doctors and RE’s all over the world, Dr Beer has achieved a success rate of over 85% in a patient group whose average age exceeds 36. The book also includes a special section on environmental toxins how natural therapies can work alongside conventional drug treatments to help balance the immune system and make it more “baby friendly”.
“Finally, a clear message that recurrent IVF failure, infertility and miscarriage can be categorized and treated. This book is a wonderful resource for all those struggling with recurrent failure and loss.” – Christo Zouves, M.D., Founder and Director of the Zouves Fertility Center.

Life After Baby Loss (NZ)

Nicola Miller-Clendon
Tandem Press, Auckland 2003
A guide to pregnancy and infant loss and subsequent pregnancy in NZ. Nicola is a practising midwife and childbirth educator and has lost 4 babies at various stages of pregnancy. 

Love Letters to Miscarried Moms: Written in the Midst of My Grief So That You Will Not Be Alone in Yours

Samantha Evans
WestBow Press 2012
The word “miscarriage,” in today’s culture, is a dirty word-rarely discussed and grossly misunderstood. Yet, one out of four pregnancies ends in this tragedy. Where are these women, Samantha wondered, after her miscarriage? Slowly, quietly, women began to approach her, but, “I’ve had a miscarriage too,” was all they could offer. Samantha realized that she had unwittingly become a member in an underground, secret society of women who suffer alone in silence.  Love Letters is the story of her journey, the same journey that each mother who miscarries begrudgingly embarks on-the excitement of pregnancy, the overwhelming, unfathomable devastation and loss, the grotesque details that no one speaks of and the uphill road toward hope and freedom.


Ann Oakley, Ann Macpherson and Helen Roberts
Britain, 1984, revised 1990 Contains lots of good medical information and common sense advice. 

Miscarriage: A Shattered Dream

Sherokee Ilse and Linda Hammer Burns
Wintergreen Press, Minnesota, 1985.
A comprehensive and insightful perspective on possible causes, medical terminology, choices and decisions, emotional aspects, planning for the future, coping suggestions and resources. Supportive and comforting.

Miscarriage: What Every Woman Needs to Know

Professor Lesley Regan
Bloomsbury, London, 1997.
Lesley Regan runs the largest miscarriage clinic in Europe at St Mary’s Hospital, London. An extremely interesting and informative book, written for both patients and doctors. In addition to addressing miscarriage causes, Dr.Regan also includes a section on answering common questions and offers practical advice on preparing for your next pregnancy.

Miscarriage: Why it happens and how best to reduce your risks – A doctors guide to the facts

Henry Lerner M.D., OB/GYN, With contributions by Alice Domar, Ph.D
Introduction by Robert Barbieri, M.D.
Perseus Publishing.

Miscarriage: Women’s experiences and needs

Christine Moulder
Britain, 1990
This very comprehensive book includes personal stories, medical information and useful tips and suggestions.

My Butterfly Gland

Louise Conway
This is the memoir of Louise who at age 30 experienced 3 recurrent miscarriages and who 2 years later was diagnosed with Thyroid Cancer. This is Louise’s story of heartbreak and loss, of grief and despair but most of all, of hope and of love.

Positively Pregnant (NZ)

Emma Patton
Penguin, Auckland, 1998.
After Emma’s first baby died, she was determined not to let the loss destroy all the joy of her subsequent pregnancy. Contains a very sensitive section on miscarriage and baby death.

Pregnancy after Loss

Jane Warland Australia, 1996
This book was self-published by an Australian midwife and survivor of miscarriage and stillbirth. Like many books, it’s more geared towards women who have experienced stillbirth, but so much of it is still relevant that it seemed a worth purchasing – especially as it is the only book I can find on this subject. Worthwhile reading if you are pregnant again or contemplating becoming so.

Subfertility: A Natural Approach to Getting Pregnant (NZ)

Julie Reid
Tandem Press, Auckland, 1999.
An increasingly common problem discussed frankly and practically. Lists many steps that you can take at home before seeking either alternative or medical help.

Surviving Miscarriage: – You Are Not Alone

Stacey McLaughlin
Published by iUniverse 2005
McLaughlin addresses the variety of emotions a woman experiences after a miscarriage and focuses on how to mend your soul. With her unique and simple thirty-day plan, you’ll be gently guided through meaningful steps to help you banish undeserved shame, embrace comforting emotional recovery and move forward with confident hope for your future.

Taking Control: How to Aim for a Successful Pregnancy (NZ)

Diana Plater
Double Day, Auckland, 1997.
A must read for those who enjoy taking control.

Talking About Miscarriage

Sarah Murphy
Sheldon Press, London, 1992.
An easy to read book by another woman whose experience of miscarriage left her wanting to help others through the process.

The Infertility Diet; Get pregnant and Prevent Miscarriage

Fern Reiss
Peanut Butter & Jelly Press
available from Amazon for $24.95 as a paperback.

The Woman Doctor’s Guide to Miscarriage

Lynne Friedman with Irene Daria
A very down to earth book with up-to-date information. It also has stories from women in several different circumstances. 

Well Woman

Dr Miriam Stoppard
Dorling Kindersley, London, 1998.
A guide to gynaecological health for women of all ages, from puberty to menopause and beyond. Easy to read and well illustrated.
2 copies 

We Were Gonna Have a Baby, But We Had an Angel Instead

by Pat Schwiebert illustrated by Taylor Bills.
The illustrations are beautiful with little text. Preschoolers and older toddlers would understand what the book is saying. The baby is eventually illustrated as an angel and talks about how ‘the baby always lives in your heart’. There are suggestions at the end of the book for helping adults help their children deal with their grief which is processed differently.

Woman’s Trouble

Ruth Trickey and Kaz Cooke
Allen & Unwin, Australia, 1998.
Covers everything from the first period to the last – and everything that can go wrong in between. Fun to read yet sensible and thorough, it helps you to make your own decisions about treatment. It explains the self-care, natural therapies and medical solutions for a huge range of ‘women’s troubles’.

Books on Loss and Grief

About what was lost: Twenty Writers on Miscarriage, Healing, and Hope

Jessica Berger Gross
Dec 26 2006 Amazon.
In this intimate anthology, twenty writers explore the grief and sadness—and hope—that living through a miscarriage can bring.

A Guide For Fathers When a Baby Dies

Tim Nelson
Revised 2007 and self-published, available at Amazon.
Unlike most books on miscarriage and infant loss, this book is written particularly for dads. Most men seem to process their grief differently from women but that does not mean fathers are not as affected by these losses in their own way.

Angel Baby – A Journal of Healing After the Loss of an Unborn, Born Still or Newborn Child

Carey Knifong
Publisher PublishAmerica
ISBN-10 1413747914
Part journal, part memoir, Carey wrote the book after experiencing the loss of her son Kodey just after his birth and goes on to pose open-ended questions hoping to get readers thinking about things. Questions are non-judgmental and filled with phrases like “I felt,” “I wondered” and “It comforts me when…
She covers an extensive variety of topics including grandparents’ grief, dealing with holidays, thoughts about God fathers, guilt and pregnancy memories among other things. 

Empty Arms (NZ)

Deborah Watkin
Education Unit, National Women’s Hospital, Auckland, 1997.
Sensitively and beautifully written by a psychologist who personally experienced neonatal death. Available as a PDF.

For the Rest of Our Lives: After the Death of a Child (NZ)

Bev Gatenby
Reid, Auckland, 1998.
Bev Gatenby is on the staff of Waikato University so the book is set in a New Zealand context. While she discusses surviving the death of born children, much of what she says applies to parents bereaved by miscarriage.

Good Grief

Granger E. Westberg
Fortress Press, Minneapolis, 1997.
This now classic booklet which has run to its 35th edition, offers a constructive approach to the problem of loss.
3 copies

Healing Your Grieving Heart after Miscarriage

Dr Alan D Wolfelt PH.D.
100 practical ideas for parents and families. The miscarriage of a hoped-for child is a shattering loss. Those who had already begun to feel attached to the baby will naturally grieve—particularly the mother and father, but also siblings this baby would have had, extended family, and friends. The loss may ripple across many lives in many ways.

Healing a Friend’s Grieving Heart

Dr Alan D Wolfelt PH.D.
100 practical ideas for helping you love though loss.

Hidden Loss: Miscarriage and Ectopic Pregnancy

Valerie Hay, Catherine Itzin, Lesley Saunders and Mary Anne Speakman
Women’s Press, London, 2nd ed, 1996.
While highly informative, many would find this book written for counsellors and doctors heavy going.

Hope is Like the Sun

Finding Hope and Healing After Miscarriage, Stillbirth, or Infant Death
by Lisa Church
Price: $15.95 Length: 176 pages

Follow the author and four of her friends as they navigate the difficult journey through pregnancy loss. This book offers information, helpful advice, and practical tips that will begin your path toward healing today. 

How I Came To Hold You

By Ben Wakeling,
Troubador Publishing, 2 Sept 2013
All proceeds from the books are donated to the charity Sands.

I Thought It Was Just Me (But it Isn’t)

Brené Brown
Penguin Group, USA, 2007.
Researcher and thought leader Dr. Brené Brown offers a liberating study on the importance of our imperfections—both to our relationships and to our own sense of self. The quest for perfection is exhausting and unrelenting. There is a constant barrage of social expectations that teach us that being imperfect is synonymous with being inadequate. Everywhere we turn, there are messages that tell us who, what and how we’re supposed to be. So, we learn to hide our struggles and protect ourselves from shame, judgment, criticism and blame by seeking safety in pretending and perfection.


Elspeth Barker
Dent, London, 1997.
Poems about loss. 

When Bad Things Happen to Good People

Harold Kushner
Pan, London, 1981.
Written by a Jewish rabbi, it helps us to put difficult life experiences into perspective, highly encouraging, recommended for those who feel ‘stuck’.

Miscarriages hurt men too

Peter Burdon
The Write Advice, Christchurch 2006
Twelve men from around the world share their miscarriage experiences.

Mommy, Please Don’t Cry: There Are No Tears in Heaven

Linda Deymaz.
It’s written from a child in Heaven’s point of view.

Silent Grief

Miscarriage – Child Loss, Finding your way through the darkness
Clara Hinton, Published by New Leaf Press

Books on Death

Embraced by the Light: What Happens When You Die

Betty Eadie
Thorsons, London, 1992.
One person’s opinion on what may possibly happen to our babies after death.

Empty Cradle, Broken Heart – Surviving the Death of Your Baby

Deborah L. Davis Ph.D.
“Resolution does not signal an end to grief. You will always feel longing and sadness.”

On Life After Death

Elisabeth Kubbler-Ross
Celestial Arts, California 1991.
A condensed easier to read version of her original, now classic work on death.

Books for Children on Grief and Loss

Wellington’s The Children’s Bookshop has an excellent collection for kids and teens – contact them for recommendations on or search grief on their website.

THE GUARDIAN UK – Top 10 Children’s Books on Death and Bereavement

Scholastic: Grief Resources for Teachers, Children, and Families 

General Information

Skylight library – Because grief happens and support matters